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SAW Antisensei




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How long have we been on the road ?


Where are we going anyway ? 


The map, which the camel had in its butt, points in this direction.


This real estate is so empty and bleak.


What's that ?


A garbage can, in the middle of the desert.


With a tape recorder.


Hello, caravan. On your journey you had lots of time to contemplate. Now you have the opportunity to dispose of your worthless belts and rank certificates. If you don't do it, you will be attacked by a herd of furious zebras.


What ?


Far and wide nothing in sight.


Anyway, there are no zebras in the sahara. I learned that from an app on my smartjeans. 


Right, and we've already come that far.


Exactly, let's move on.


This time he is only mucking around.


He is losing his touch.


You hear that noise ?


Sounds like engines.


A plane is approaching.


It is dropping something.


Oh no, zebras with parachutes.


Appearing somewhat upset.


Seriously in panic mode.


Now they are crash-landing.


Pow, right in the nostrils. That would really piss me off.


They are aimlessly standing around and ...


... getting taller.


No, they are running towards us.


Looking really aggressive and ... attacking us. Why ?


Because they take us for zebras. With our white training uniforms and the black belts, we look like them. Now they want to defend their territory or ... yuck.


We have to throw away our black belts and rank certificates. That will distract them.


Seems to work.


Ok, that's it, let's keep going.




Why, the sand grains do all look different.


Something's over there.


Looks like a catapult.


The thing is huge.


There are people in its basket.


They are from the budo association. One of them looks like ...


Yes, that must be him.


Seems they have found a tape recorder.


Can you understand anything ?


No, it's too far away.






Hello, guild quacks. In 100 seconds the catapult will be released, and you will be slung away. Above you is a harness to save the most important one of you lot. The choice is yours.






What's happening ?


They talk to each other.


Now they scream at each other.


Now they are figthing.


There is a countdown display.


10 - 9 - 8 ...


Still brawling.


Maybe we should keep sufficient distance.


Should have done that much earlier.


3 - 2 - 1 - 0 ...


Wow - they are airborne.


How high.


How fast.


Seems that some are still fighting in mid-air.


But with a serious lack of hip power.


How far away they already are.


Hardly visible.


Our club charlatan and his entourage wasn't among them. I wonder what he might be doing now ?






Hello, antisensei. In front of you are two doors. If you walk through the first one, you will be brought into exile to begin your catharsis. If you walk through the second door, you will become the instructor of an incapable and uncritical beginner's course recognising you as their master. Both scenarios will be broadcast live in the Internet. Make your choice.


No question I take the second door. Everybody will see how good I am. I will lead them to black belt level in record time and start a new club.


Hello, I am your new sensei ...


Oink, moo, baa, cluck cluck, hee-haw, ribbit ...






End of part III

 2015 FAW