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Spring |
Summer |
Autumn |
Winter |
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Budo Zodiacs |
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Member

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Plan forward and use this year for martial arts
practice. Avoid contaminated clubs. |
A constellation of turning a blind eye and whitewashing
ensures a frictionless relation to the
graduation authority. |
The
wisdom of a black hole pulls you into its influence. Set
yourself high standards and forget them
immediately. |
Let the old year fade away with
a torrent of curses against club poisoners. |
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Antisensei

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Stay true to
yourself. Radiate superiority by running down
beginners. |
A surprising insight comes up.
Even your level can still be lowered. Expand your sphere of
influence by asking toddlers for favours. |
Encourage innovations. The
suggestion to build you a throne will surely be well received by
your underlings. |
The big budo event takes place
in the third house. The increase of fed-ups
initiates the decline of your
ascent. |
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Examiner

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Embrace movie
quotes.
Even in rank
examinations your
munificence should be boundless. |
Don't get stuck within your
complacent routine of churning out promotions. Accept new
challenges by using multicolored stamp
pads. |
The career star rotates
proficiently. Take advantage of your martial art's identity crisis
and promote yourself. |
At the end of the year,
unused rank certificates have to be disposed of as hazardous
waste. |
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Official

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Prepare for prospective assignments. Become a campaign
volunteer for two or three corrupt politicians. |
Your sign stands for abolishment of
discrimination. You defraud
everybody. |
The future is
yours. Exploit conflicts within the budo association to
place your cronies in key positions. |
Make a
fortune. Bet with outsiders that next year nobody will
fail belt examinations. |
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Instructor

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This year you should set ambitious
goals. Try to raise the advanced class level to
"bad". |
Obey fundamental laws. A further
reduction of requirements is a quantum mechanical
impossibility. |
During the second half of the year,
the students' self-confidence can be increased
by full-contact showering. |
Stay focused and avoid stooping
to an antisensei level. |
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Helper

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The budo bungler counts on
you. Retrieve club renegades and get rewarded with the
next rank. |
You will be assigned
vital tasks. Scrutinize other helpers' loyalty to
the antisensei. |
Become a role model. Contrast with the crowd through
especially far reaching preemptive
obedience. |
The year draws to a
close. Get the anti club president his
long-desired free and reticent secretary. |
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Returner

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Gain fresh insight. Tell a
fed-up about your intention and then interpret his
ROTFLBTC. |
Don't do it until
having recursively understood the perilous serenity procured by
the pivotal flavor of this sentence. |
The wisdom of
autumn leaves advises caution. Pursue more promising goals by
breeding DVD players. |
Or visit the spa
of Atlantis. |
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Examinee

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Insist on your consumer rights and demand 24/7 service
from the rank promotion industry. |
The examination rules ascendent rewards your endurance
during the waiting
period. |
The giveaway star
brings joy. As with all merchandise, there is a two year
warranty on graduations. |
The local antisensei has spotted you.
Thus you have fullfilled
the most important part of rank
examinations. |
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Changer

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Rethink your decision to join an
anti-dojo for several thousand orbits around the
sun. |
The dream moon yields decisiveness. Better quit
completely than aquiring anything seriously
flawed. |
Keep a cool head. Attending a graduation
travesty at the targeted club will bring you down to
earth. |
Stay clear of the fourth
house of humbug. Choose the lesser evil and wallow in a garbage dump
of your choice. |
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Fed-Up

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Stop fooling yourself and desist from decorating
the sinking ship. |
The summer break is ideally suited to forget the
ramblings of the anti-master. |
The comet of insight touches your aura.
An old saying goes: Pull out and talk
about. |
To prevent being detected by the
anti club chairman, plastic surgery must no longer be a
taboo. |
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Sponsor

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Break with traditions.
Feeding a shredder your money is the proper alternative to
sponsoring the pseudojo. |
At the end of the
season, there will be ample options to beat your own record in
wasting money. |
In autumn, a window of opportunity
opens. A company offers the free disposal of your
money. |
The end-of-year review exposes you as
gullibility on a stick. |
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Follower

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Separate orbits interfere for your
advantage. This year, obedience and inability blend into a harmonic
success formula. |
Seize promising
occasions. Reporting possible club
renegades buys you lots of sympathy with the
wannabe-boss. |
Don't get sloppy.
Protecting the system requires personal dedication.
Prevent critics from talking. |
Your efforts finally pay off. You are
mentioned on the Karate-Doctor website. |
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Sceptic

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Between January 1 and December 31 is the
best time to leave your present club. |
Learn from other
people's follies. Read
the heart-melting
report about a disillusioned
helper. |
Get into gear and
graduate from insight to consequence. |
Tie a belt round a pet and
observe how nobody cares about
it. |